Friday, September 28, 2012

7 Quick Takes: Good News and Bad News



1

Good news: It's raining. Bad news: The dogs are mud balls. 

I'll be mopping several times this week or I'll be apologizing to anyone who happens to come by.

2

Good news: Most of the kids are feeling better. Bad news: They are still probably contagious, so I can't go to my Bible Study tonight unless I hire a babysitter. 

"Goodbye pocket money!"

3

Good news: Andy got the morning off. Bad news: It's on account of his having to go to the dentist after breaking a tooth on a walnut.

He's miserable. Poor guy.

4

The really good news: I have cookies! The bad news: I have cookies. 

Someone come eat them so I can be the same weight by Monday!

5
Chefs Beware!
Recipes are acts of creativity and chemistry. They are almost always written after the magic happened. Memories and reality sometimes don't combine well, so I usually only rely on published cookbooks and a few trusted and consistent sources on-line (The Food Network and Two Blessed) unless I do a thorough preview. Until yesterday, that is.

Yesterday I had some ingredients I wanted to go together and went to the Internet to find a recipe to work from. Nothing was on my usual sites, so I had to pick one that looked good. I noticed after I'd already mixed several ingredients that the oats mentioned in the title had never actually made it into the ingredient list--a sure sign I was dealing with a faulty recipe. Knowing I had either a potential disaster or a creative opportunity on my hands, from that point on, I made notes and made three versions of the recipe. Two of which are worth your time:


6

Oat and Butternut Squash Cookies (Wheat Free)

Whisk together these dry ingredients:
3 cups Pamela's Products Bread Mix
1/4 tsp xantham gum
1 cup whole oats
3/4 tsp baking soda
3/4 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg

Cream together these moist ingredients:
1 cup butter (or butter flavored shortening)
1 1/2 cups packed brown sugar
1/3 cup sugar
2 large eggs
2 1/2 tsp vanilla

Blend the flour mixture into the butter and sugar mixture until smooth, then stir in the following:
1 cup whole Craisins
1 cup cooked butternut squash, cut into small pieces
2 Tbs honey
1/4 cup chopped shelled walnuts

Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Drop the dough by heaping spoonfuls, about 3 inches apart, onto papered or greased cookie sheet.. Bake for approximately 15 minutes, turning tray halfway through, until browned evenly and until the center is slightly firm at the touch (be aware that the cookies will continue to cook during the next step). Let this cake-like cookie cool for several minutes on the tray before transferring to a cookie rack to cool.

7

Oat and Butternut Squash Coffee Cake

Whisk together these dry ingredients:
3 cups flour
1 cup uncooked whole oats
3/4 tsp baking soda
3/4 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg

Cream together these moist ingredients:
1 cup butter or shortening
1 1/2 cups packed brown sugar
1/3 cup sugar
2 large eggs
2 1/2 tsp vanilla


Blend the flour mixture into the butter and sugar mixture until smooth, then stir in the following:
1 cup whole Craisins
1 cup cooked butternut squash, cut into small pieces
2 Tbs honey
1/4 cup chopped shelled walnuts


Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Grease a bundt pan and bake for 40 to 50 minutes or until toothpick inserted into cake comes out dry. Let cake cool on rack in pan until completely cool. Turn onto a cake platter and glaze or dust with powdered sugar.

Glaze (optional)
1 cup powdered sugar
1 tsp vanilla
2 Tbs water

Add or decrease water to desired thickness. Mix until smooth and drizzle onto cooled cake.

These are both wickedly delicious! Bon appetit! (French for time to buy elastic waistband pants!)





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Jennifer Fulwiler
Thanks to Jennifer Fulwiler, a fellow Texan, for hosting
7 Quick Takes Friday 

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Wifey Wednesday: Naggity Nag Nag

Nag at Work II



We all know that nagging doesn't work (link to the original Nag at Work post). What we might not realize is the infinite variety of nagging that we indulge in.

So, let me start with a little story...

A few weeks ago, my husband and I were getting ready to go to church when my husband made a Big Mistake. The Big Mistake hurt my feelings, but we didn't have time to hash it out in the mad dash of getting five children and two adults out the door. All I managed was a quick, "Wow, honey, that hurt. Thanks for that," in a sarcastic fly by.

In the meantime I yelled at my Autistic son for something that wasn't his fault. Did I feel bad? Indeed, I did. In fact, I got into the Nagivator Seat of the van after apologizing for the third time and berated myself all the way to church. It's only about a 30 minute drive, so I wasn't half done by the time we got there.

We arrived. My husband put the van into Park, turned to me, put his hand on my knee and proceeded to give me the best apology in our entire history together. "Chris," he began, "I am so sorry. It was dumb and thoughtless and you didn't deserve that. I am sorry." 

I was shocked. I was stunned. And I was perplexed because, frankly, I'd no clue what he was apologizing for. I was so distracted by my own mistake that I'd actually forgotten about his. I still don't remember, so I can't fill in the blanks here. It took me a minute to connect this apology with any event and then all I managed was remembering being upset, remembering the moment I called him on it, but nothing more.

I stammered something appropriate (I hope) and we proceeded with debarkation procedures and managed to be seated before the first song (barely).

"That was some apology," I reflected as we settled into our seats. In those few short minutes I had to think, I pondered along these lines: "What could have brought that on? It wasn't major, really, or I'd have remembered. Why was he so sorry this time? What was different?"

Then God hit me in the back of the head with a two-by-four. I was different. 

I'd not had time to battle it out. I'd not had a chance to discuss the issue to death. I had not insisted on an apology. I had not nagged and questioned him on his motives. I'd been too busy, and then I'd been too subdued by my own mistake. I'd been quiet. There was the big difference. I'd let my husband's own good nature work on his conscience instead of my sharp tongue.


The really stupid part of all this is knowing that nagging doesn't work and needing to learn this lesson anyway. The only good thing about this story is I've been doing much better about letting some time come between any given incident and the discussion of it. I did learn something and have been duly rewarded. The apologies I'm receiving lately are improving over the resentful, "Fine! I'm sorry!"s of yore.

What I learned from it was that nagging is not limited to me trying to get something done. Sometimes it's about making him make me feel better--using him to bandage my feelings. Pope John Paul II once said that the opposite of love is not hate, it is use. We are not to use anyone as a means to an end and we are especially not to use our loved ones. We are to love. Period.

If nagging is something you struggle with, too, here's some hard won gems I've learned this time around. (For the hard won gems I learned last time around, click here.):

Nagging is Fruitless
Nagging does not get real results even when it seems to. Someone parroting what you want to hear just to shut you down is not a satisfying replacement for the real thing.A real apology after a day or so of reflection is more emotionally satisfying than a forced one in the moment. Let some time and space in.



Nagging is Damaging
If this is you, open brain and insert God. Amen.
Even if you are in the right, nagging him to admit you're right is not right. Nagging is using language to bend someone to your will. It's selfish behavior. Marital discord does not heal by adding more bad behavior into the mix. Marriage is about pulling together. Family life is about being a Christian even when you're hurt. It's about bearing wrongs patiently and forgiving 70 times 7 times, only it is up close and personal. It's hard work! God calls us to be faithful in all things, but especially in these day to day moments where we chose to be Godly or not. Nagging is a choice, a bad one. Like any choice when we face any temptation, we can choose to serve God or we can serve ourselves.

Nagging is Not Christian
Nagging drives a wedge between you and your beloved. When you nag you are being aggressive. You are generating resentment. You are saying, in effect, that you will continue to behave badly until he behaves better. It's you making him suffer because you have suffered. That sounds incredibly antithetical to the Christian call to bear wrongs patiently. In fact, it is using his sins against you as an excuse to sin against him.

Nagging is for God Alone
No, I'm not saying that God nags. What I'm saying is that the only place where nagging bears any fruit at all is in prayer. Like Luke 18:1-8, you may indulge in your need to nag by nagging God. The best part of this little piece of advice is this: in order to change bad behavior you must replace the behavior. In the case of nagging, you don't have to stop nagging, you merely need to change the object of your nagging. If your spouse is upsetting you, go to God over and over and over about it. Pour your heart out, complain, whine and cry. He can take it. He can also do something about it for you.

In fact, the first thing He is likely to do about it is to change you.


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For more of me nagging about nagging, listen to the Podcast!
 
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Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Rite of Passage

We've got sicko kiddos over here and mom caught it, too. So, after the schoolwork was done, we took the afternoon off to watch movies. It gave the sick kids something to focus on while they drifted in and out, and it gave the healthier ones something quiet to do while mommy attempted to rest (ha!).
Image Source

Today's choice was Star Wars, Episode IV, the Star Wars that started it all. I was about my oldest girl's age when I first saw it and now it's her turn. Her summation?

Anna, "Well, the guy in black was playing and then the father guy..."
Daddy, "That's not Luke's father. That's his friend."
Anna, "The guy's father..."
Daddy, "It's kinda important, Anna. Ben is not his father."
Anna, "The guy that was the father guy, well he..."
*spoiler alert* Daddy, with pleading eyes and desperation, "That's not his father. Actually the guy in black is his father. Not that you know that yet, but still!"
Anna, pauses thoughtfully. "Well...that guy in black was playing and then the father guy," puzzled look at dad, "he put his hands down like this and that guy just kills him and he all disappeared. It was weird."
Daddy sighs.
Anna, "Why did he just die like that?"
"That was sad, huh."
Anna, "He could have played with him. He could have runned away. Why did he quit playing and die?"
Daddy, "Uh...I don't know."
How did those brave daddies of the 70s answer that one? Anyone?

Sunday, September 23, 2012

7 Quick Takes


1
We Martins entered several items in the Tri-State Fair this year. John won ribbons for a sugar pumpkin and a butternut squash. Anna won for her applesauce. Sissy won for her grape jelly. It was the kids' first year for entering. I fully expect schemes for a half dozen entries a piece next year, especially when that prize money comes in. $10 between the three of them!

2
The other night we had an electric fence malfunction that scared our dog out of his wits. He went into hiding and wouldn't come when we called him. Since we couldn't find him inside and none of the kids were 100% sure they'd not let him outside, we were worried we had a lost dog. Given the coyote situation around here, stray dogs don't last long (FYI to the people who dump dogs in the country hoping they'll survive in the wild: they don't). All was well as soon as the dog food hit the bowl this morning and our Drover came out of his hiding spot eager to please in his timid and easily cowed way. Thank goodness!

3
Drover is an adopted doggie who suffered much abuse before we took him in. He's so easily intimidated that even a verbal rebuke sends him into hiding. As a result we have a two dog system for alerting us to strangers, strays, and evil mailmen bent on world domination. We have a 6 inch high Dachshuahua named Daisy (a.k.a. Crazy Daisy) to do all the barking and menacing. She's backed up by our wimpy Lab. Since his protective instincts are a tad stronger than his self-preservation instincts, he stands guard over her standing guard over us. No one coming by would notice that he's playing second fiddle to a squirt, so the system functions. It's not Plan A, nor is it pretty (mainly because Daisy is so strange looking), but it works.

4
Having grown up in The Church of Christ, I have a profound love for a capella music. This has twisted itself into a real appreciation for Beat Box. I'd like to share with you two versions of a song and tell you my favorite is the latter, for various reasons, though those elephants are pretty cute...





5
 I'm late with my Quick Takes again. I shamefully stuck it down here in the Quitting Spot hoping plenty of you had wandered off before I had to apologize again. Probably should have led off with it, but I really hate to repeat myself.

Sorry.

Again.

6 
The Quitting Spot

The Quitting Spot is that just-over-halfway point in any job where the temptation hits to quit. That's actually at around 4 or 5 on a list like this. You see that halfway mark go by and think something like, "I've got to give this just as much effort to finish as I've already put in." It's not a good thing to think when you are in the middle of a nasty, hard, repetitive, or otherwise effort hungry job. If you can hang in there past the temptation, the end will come in sight and your efforts will have a purpose again. I've thought about that spot many a time when I slogged past it, determined to finish. On the other hand, I avoid thinking of The Quitting Spot when I succumb to it. Instead I use all that leftover effort on dreaming up adequate excuses to justify quitting.

7
Here we are again, at perfection. The sun is no longer a bossy brute. The garden is past middle age and needs a rest. The breeze is remembering itself as something gray and wild, promising to bite. I have pumpkins to bake and beans to soak. Happy Fall, y'all!

A spot in Chilicothe, Texas

Butternut Squash 

1 medium butternut squash, halved lengthwise and seeded
1 teaspoon butter
2 teaspoons brown sugar
Salt and pepper
2 TBS cream

Directions

Preheat oven to 400 degrees F.

Place butternut squash halves on a large baking sheet flesh side up. Spread butter over the flesh of the squash halves and sprinkle brown sugar evenly over both. Season with salt and black pepper. Roast 25 to 30 minutes, until flesh is fork-tender. Spoon out into a bowl, add cream and mash with a fork. Serve steaming.


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Jennifer Fulwiler
Thanks to Jennifer Fulwiler, a fellow Texan, for hosting
7 Quick Takes Friday 

Friday, September 14, 2012

7 Quick Takes



1
I have been reluctant to write on the blog. It's a daily struggle that ends with succumbing to the excuses of being too busy, too distracted, too this or that. Really, it's an absurd flush of shyness that has kicked in. Thank you for bearing with me. I'm not succumbing to it anymore, now that I've identified it, self mastery being the name of the game.

2
Why do this blogging and podcasting anyway? Well, that's a question I've been pondering lately. The main reason is that family life is worthy of notice, though it is mostly hidden. Even Christ Himself treasured it enough to keep it mostly to Himself. I don't have any particularly spectacular things to say. In fact, most everything that I do say is quite ordinary. As one long ago ex-boyfriend once quipped, "You have a fine grasp of the obvious." I'll take that as a compliment. My talents are in the teacherly vein: I notice something needing seeing, I sense where the trouble spots are, and I can point down the path. It's an encouraging talent that I have. So, enough with the burying of the few talents I've been given. Me and my ordinariness are back to work, pointing out the beauty and the struggle in the obvious, just in case someone has been missing it.


3
How's school going?

We're muddling right along. The first month has wound down into that "This again?" slowdown. It's a mild rebellion of spirit that means incentives are a bit more necessary to slog through the day. I promise you a cup of sweet mint tea, my dears, if you finish your work before lunch. Would that every job could have such easy motivation!


4
Humor and Autism

My son with Autism has discovered humor. He's always been funny, and loves to generate laughter in others, but now he has discovered he can do it with language. He's using his speech generation program on his iPad to do it. Teaching kids humor skills are easy with a book of Knock Knock jokes. They are formulaic, easily memorized, and the humor lies in the unexpected twist. You can point out the humor of them easily. So if my son comes up to you and pushes the button that says, "Knock knock!" be sure to laugh at the punch line. He's not above nagging with a repeated finger on the "haha!" button. "Haha...haha...hahahahaha." Fair warning.

5
Did you catch that we teach humor?
Indeed, it is a teachable skill. It's a necessary one. We begin with pointing out the unexpected in whatever funny thing just happened or admiring the execution of a great joke. We wait until the laughter has died down, of course, but the discussions often lead to more. We love to laugh, we Martins, so we want to ensure that the kids know how to bring laughter out, with the usual cautions of, "It's only funny if everyone laughs!" to ensure kindness. Kids are natural hams, mostly, so we want to give them the skills to take the spotlight, deliver their lines, and give it up gracefully. We think the world needs more funny people, so we're making a few more for you.

You're welcome.


Protestant and Catholic: Common Words but Often Not a Common Experience

We Catholics believe that the Church is vital--the actual Church. This is why dissident Catholics stick around so much and cause scandal by parading their personal opinions as actual dogma. Protestants on the other hand often have to suffer through being a Church of One. Many spend decades "church hopping" to find a church that teaches what he or she personally believes. Given the infinite variety of beliefs, most usually end up compromising something in favor of "at least they're family friendly" or "the music is good." It's a struggle that Catholics simply don't understand, and the difference gets in the way of many a discussion between us. When a Catholic discusses "belief," it is a belief that has been handed down for 2,000 years and the struggle has been to bend one's will to that Truth. When a Protestant discusses "belief," it is one that has been discovered and won personally. On most issues, we use the same words, but mean things incredibly divergent. We simply don't speak the same language, so be careful out there.

7
I'd like to encourage my readers and Podcast buddies to join me over on Facebook. I do a bit of "microblogging" over there. I try to practice those humor skills in my updates. Join me, if you like! Let's be FB friends!