Friday, December 9, 2011

7 Quick Takes: The Left Behind Edition

Jennifer Fulwiler
Thanks to Jennifer Fulwiler, a fellow Texan, for hosting
7 Quick Takes Friday 

1 - Since I wasn't able to get to a computer nearly all day due to baking at my friend's house, I thought I'd be a smarty pants and write my first draft on a piece of paper. I even enlisted some feedback on the topics. Everything! I had a draft. I'd collaborated. It was going to be great. I managed to make it home without the list, but you'd probably guessed that already. I mean, you've read this blog before.

2 - Sometimes I forget that it isn't normal to have children with their parents during the day, so I took the brood of wee Martins shopping this morning. I got a lot of looks (no, they were perfectly fine until someone praised them--see #4) and one woman actually said, "Some of these children look like they belong in school." I blinked at her blankly for a moment and began lamely explaining myself when something enthusiastic took over. I gushed, "Oh, we're HOMEschoolers! We worked really hard to finish our work for the week yesterday so we could spend today baking!!!" I gestured dramatically to the cart full of butter-flavored lard, extracts, and food coloring. She looked perplexed, so I finished off with, "Isn't that the coolest thing you've ever heard of? We HOMEschool." Now, if only I could evangelize like that for NFP.

3 -  Okay, wait. Now I'm enjoying that NFP evangelization idea. Walking through the store with the Martin Five, and someone saying, "Are all those yours? Don't you know what causes that?" I could gush, "Oh we're CATHolic! We charted really hard to get them all spaced close together so we could spend our children's inheritance on disposable diapers and sippy cups!!!" When they look perplexed by my enthusiasm, I could add, "We LIKE children. We really LIKE them!" Then I might nod at them vigorously while contemplating how to work the words mucus and fecundity into the conversation.
Someone's in a fertile phase!
4 - Now that everyone has run screaming from their computers (I promise I won't say mucus again) it's probably a little late to make this plea, but here goes. Please don't ever tell me I have well behaved children. At least not while I'm with them and in public. I will start hyperventilating and breaking out into a sweat. You see, the words, "You have such sweet little children!" sets the timer ticking on the tantrum bomb. This nice-seeming little old man said that to us today and two of my children exploded moments later. It wasn't pretty. I'm working hard to forgive him. He meant no harm.

5 - Speaking of enthusiasm, while googling the picture above, I discovered to my horror that there are websites with titles such as "How-to-stay-enthusiastic-all-the-time!" Yes, the dashes seem to be part of the pleasure. Maybe it's to remind you that you must say it all in one breathy squeal.

6 - Mucus. Yes, I said it. I said it again.

7 - Is there anybody left reading this? Anyone? C'mon now, #7 is about chaaaarrrrtiiing!

No comments:

Post a Comment